What’s going on my loves? How is everyone doing? I truly apologize for taking so long to post something new. Sometimes I just can’t find the right words to finish my thoughts and make them click perfectly. I’ve been working on this post for a while, but the words weren’t meshing the way I wanted them to so I left it alone until they did. It’s a rather tricky subject so I wanted the words to flow in a certain way. Anyway, I’m hoping to find my groove so that I can post something new every week. Being a “newbie blogger,” it may take me a while so please bear with me.
First, let me say that I hope you all found my last post “Look Book #1 – My Latest Finds” entertaining, cute and informative. I adore shopping and I can see the Look Book series will be fun for me to write but more importantly, finding new and cute things to buy will be fantastic for me *winks*. With that being said, did anyone click on the links and find anything they’d like to share? If you did, please feel free to comment your findings on that post and let us all know. We must keep each other looking fabulous because that is after all, my intended goal with this blog.
So as I’ve taken to people watching to get ideas on new posts as well as new designing ideas, I’ve noticed that many of us go to great lengths for fashion and beauty. So much so, that a few weeks ago I noticed a lady who was clearly in horrible pain walking down the NYC streets in six inch heels (yes I can usually tell how high the heel is just by looking – lol), and I felt so bad for her because I thought she was going to topple over. Her facial expression screamed “OMG these darn shoes hurt” but on she went barely able to take the next step yet she was definitely trying to work those gorgeous shoes, and I was really rooting for her. Poor Thing! I felt her pain. So this brought to mind the phrase “pain in the name of fashion” and let’s add “beauty” to the phrase. Watching that scenario I had to chuckle to myself and at the lady in horrid pain because I was witnessing the perfect example of those words.
At that moment I wondered about the things we do to ourselves just to look amazing. I decided to blog about this topic, give you my point of view and maybe get your opinion on why we choose to go through pain and/or discomfort in whatever form, in order to look and/or feel good…
Is it really worth it? The question does not only pertain to shoes but to all the things we choose to wear or do to ourselves to look good. How many times do we buy one size smaller than we should whether it’s a great pair of shoes or an article of clothing? How many of us will buy an outfit knowing the fit is uncomfortable but it’s a fabulous outfit, and we have to have it so to hell with comfort. How often do we choose to wear uncomfortable contact lenses because we don’t want to wear glasses (although glasses are very trendy now), we go on diets sometimes extreme, to lose a certain amount of weight because in our minds and eyes, that will make us look and feel better (however, in certain cases it will make a person feel better health wise). What about plastic surgery? To me, this is just about the ultimate extreme and some people choose it not once but several times. Yet, even in the smallest way, we will choose looking good or putting ourselves through physical pain as opposed to being comfortable and happy the way we are. Even when we accessorize we can choose appearance over comfort. For instance, I bought this wonderful handbag at T.J. Maxx that is absolutely beautiful but guess what, it’s not very accommodating but I’m still using it because it’s just a fabulous bag. So you see, there are many ways, big and small, in which we choose looking good over being comfortable and painless. Why is that? The answer to this question varies from one individual to another so I’m going to give you my point of view on how I perceive this subject. Check it:
I believe that we live in a society that is 100% focused on appearance, age and just looking young. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this when it’s all in good fun, harmless or done to enhance an already confident personality. I mean who doesn’t want to look great all the time? However, when it becomes an obsession, I think the person should take a few steps back and analyze why they’re going to such extremes for fashion and/or beauty. I think today’s society puts so much pressure on appearance and a select few have set the standards on what is “beautiful” and “acceptable.” This makes some people feel like they have to go to whatever lengths to fit that standard. It’s not only going to an extreme however, it could be in the smallest way. Whatever is in style or is trending at the moment, we all feel the need to follow that trend. Right now mile high heels are in demand so women are all for it. Which brings me back to the lady I watched suffering in her six inch heels… They’re in style and they really do make us look sexy so why not? Again I ask, is it worth it?
Okay, so I may have just ruffled a few feathers, but what’s a little controversy among friends… right? 🙂
Is it worth it? I ask. My answer, and this is solely in regards to myself and my choices, is yes and no. I say yes because there are times that I’m willing to go through a little pain and discomfort in the name of fashion. I will wear an uncomfortable outfit or two, I’ve been known to wear an ill-fitting pair of shoes because they are marvelous and as I mentioned in my example above, I will even accessorize uncomfortably if the piece is worth it. Seriously though, this handbag is really exquisite so I’m going to use it for a while whether it accommodates my needs or not. So There! 😉
Lately however, I’m noticing that I am choosing comfort more often. I still buy amazing pairs of shoes, mile high heels and all, but they have to fit just right. If they hurt my pretty little feet, I will not buy them. I’m leaning a lot towards flats these days as well. Same goes for clothing… If I try on an outfit and it does not feel comfortable, if I have to keep adjusting anything, I move on to the next one. There will always be another fabulous outfit or amazing pair of shoes in the next aisle or the next store. That’s what we need to keep in mind when shopping. There’s always another choice.
Now, my reasons for saying no are more related to extremes and not so much related to clothing, shoes or accessories. I don’t think I would ever put myself through plastic surgery. I feel like eight times out of ten, you end up looking so different than what you did before going under the knife and it might end up not being a good look. Plus, I know the pain of post-surgery can be awful and let’s face it, the less physical pain I have to endure in life, the better. Okay, I admit it I’m a punk when it comes to pain. Another thing I would not do for the sake of fashion or beauty is to starve myself. It’s a very dangerous thing to do to your body that can have horrible consequences. That is a definite no for me. If you have to diet because it’s necessary, that’s an entirely different matter. Even if it is just to make you feel good and stay in shape, it is okay but never ever go the extreme of starving yourself for the sake of beauty or to meet some made up standard. You can very well put your life at risk. So basically, if it’s something that will completely change you, hurt you or put your life in jeopardy, I say it is absolutely not worth it. Again, these are my answers as they relate to me, my body and my choices.
I’m not going to try and convince you to not do any of these things when it comes to this issue because I feel it is a personal decision, but I will say this: You were born looking a certain way for a reason. You are unique. You are one individual and there is nobody else like you on this earth. You are beautiful. You are YOU! Embrace your fabulous self. It’s okay to wear shoes that cause your feet a little bit of pain, to wear an uncomfortable outfit or contact lenses in a different color… yes, all this is okay if it makes you feel fabulous regardless of the discomfort because at the end of the day, you can take all this off and say ahh… I made it through the day, in pain but I looked damn good today! However, please just think twice before going to certain extremes just to look good. Think about your “natural you” and if you really want to change it. Consider your health first and whether what you are about to do can affect it in any way. If it will, please consider other options. Instead, search within yourself, your heart and your soul for something that will tell you that you are beautiful just the way you are. That YOU accept yourself and how you look, and who cares what the world thinks. If you’re curvy, embrace your curves. If you’re slim, show off that fit body. Love every feature on your face… your brown eyes, your full lips, those cheekbones… every part of your body is yours and only yours and nobody else on this earth has those features just so but YOU. If you can find that voice within, you will believe it and you will think twice before doing anything that will change you or hurt you. Be confident in yourself. Give yourself a pep talk to increase your self-esteem. You’ll be surprised at what talking to yourself in a positive way can do… LOL, no really – I do it a lot and it works. There’s a quote I love that says:
So go ahead and CELEBRATE yourself beautiful lady or man! Do not wait for the world to do it. I know it’s definitely flattering when the world celebrates you but if you can encourage yourself and tell yourself that you are wonderful, gorgeous and lovely just the way you are, I think that counts so much more and it will build your confidence. Try it; you’ll see it’s true. Wear your painful shoes or those jeans that are way too tight if you feel great in them but always tell yourself first that YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL, YOU ARE FABULOUS no matter what you wear, regardless if you don’t fit the “standard,” feel great about YOU and then walk out that door full of confidence, with your head held high because you know it’s true and work it!
I hope this post has enlightened you in some way, perhaps you were thinking of doing something extreme and this may change your mind. If it has, I’m happy my words helped. On the other hand, if I’ve offended you or you disagree with my point of view, as always, please feel free to comment respectfully below and let me know what your feelings and opinions are regarding this subject. This can make for great conversation and who knows who we can help with our positive input. So you all know the deal my loves… comment below and let’s talk. Let’s encourage each other. Go! #engage.
As always, thank you for stopping by my “Open Closet.”
Until next time my loves…